While everyone and there mother is pretty much over the train wreck that is MTV’s Jersey Shore, the porno industry is just beginning their Garden State parody adventures. While a number of Jersey Shore spoofs are in the works, this is the first trailer I’ve seen so far. And let me tell you, it was quite a way to start a Monday morning.
While this may not get you as hard as Pauly D’s gelled updo, it will definitely bring the laughs. It’s true, those PopPorn/Zero Tolerance people are some seriously funny folks.
Plus, I totally love James Deen as Pauly D. Somehow he can even make an Ed Hardy shirt seem less douchey.
While I had a whole other mixtape picked out for today, I actually heard this in the car on the way to work and I just knew I had to post it.
Man oh man, did I love Nine Inch Nails back in the day. I remember being a bratty teenager, blasting NIN on my discman and totally ignoring my mom as she drove me to and from the mall to hang out with my other gothy mallrat friends. I’m not sure why I’m telling you this, other than to totally humiliate myself on the internet. But really, isn’t that what the world wide web was made for? Anyway, aside from my highly embarrassing mall stories, NIN still colors my early memories about exploring sex. Yeah, I definitely lost my virginity* to Pretty Hate Machine…
* Ok, it wasn’t really my virginity virginity. But it was the only time I’ve ever slept with a bio dude, so I guess it’s some sort of virginity. And yeah, that means I gave my v-card to a lady. And don’t worry, I’m being totally appropriate… we were adults at the time.
Happy Friday. Now back to denying my shameful mallrat past…
I probably should have just stuck with my original idea… far less mortifying for myself.
Happy Humpday! Welcome back to the mid-week stretch. And welcome to February! We are officially out of the first month of the year and really starting to get going on 2010. The weeks may go by slowly, but those months just fly right by! So let’s slow down and savor the link loving – and of course celebrate the humpiness that is Humpday!
- Not something you see every day – a cervix piercing. BMEzine has an article (with pictures!) about Ash Crawford’s post-gender experience and internal body mods. Super interesting, from both gender and modification standpoints. Read the rest of this entry »
Happy Groundhog’s Day! From what the news said this am, Punxsutawney Phil came out of his burrow on Gobbler’s Knob (best name ever) and saw his shadow, which unfortunately translates to us dealing with six more weeks of winter. Boooo.
But instead of just glumly keeping my gloves and hat by the front door and my gas bill through the roof, this year I’ve decided to stay warm a little differently… with porn, of course!
So, follow my lead and deal with these extra weeks of frigid wind and snowy conditions by filling your mind with warmer temps, sunny locations, and lots and lots of hot hardcore action!
Thinking warm thoughts!
xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery
Ps. I know there are other weather predicting groundhogs out there, but Phil is a Pennsylvania staple and he has a Gobbler’s Knob, so really he wins in my book!
- Queer porn performer extraordinaire Jiz Lee give us an in depth look at a few Holes hit by gay porn. I kind of wish it was a video blog… note to self: ask Jiz for video blogs.
- Mariah Carey recently called into husband Nick Cannon’s radio show pretending to be a woman that loves watching porn and saying “I think everyone should experiment with porn… I’m talking about porn like the really hardcore stuff.” I don’t really get the joke here, since there is nothing wrong with loving porn, but I do know it would be awesome if it turns out to be true! Finally, something to make up for Glitter… (via Jezebel)
- A California school district wanted to pull the Merriam-Webster Dictionary from it’s k-8 schools because it contained the definition for “oral sex.” Seriously – they wanted to ban the dictionary! Words are failing me… guess I need that filthy, filthy DICtionary… Update: They are not BANNING the dictionary, just merely putting under tight restriction.
- A new study links long term unemployment to increased sex drive. Well, I guess if there’s nothing else to do… Unfortunately the study ties the unemployment/sex study to risky sex behaviors and general disregard for sexual health and safety. Damn. (via Jezebel)
I will never forget the first time I saw her. The elevator doors opened, and I was immediately struck by her beauty. She was tall, probably taller than me, had beautiful eyes, lips that just begged to be kissed, and the most perfect breasts I had ever seen. I immediately felt an attraction to her, which was odd, because I had always considered myself straight, I’d never been attracted to another woman before. But from the first moment, I wanted Angie.
The first few weeks around the office were tough, for the first time I could relate to all the guys who I had just thought were morons. I didn’t know what to say, how to act around her. Every time I saw her, I just wanted to touch her, to kiss those beautiful lips and explore every inch of her body. I had already dreamed of it so many times, cradling her soft, supple breasts in my hands, kissing her neck, her shoulders, finally my mouth finding her nipples… and I couldn’t even imagine what must lay between her beautiful, silky thighs. I wanted to find out. Read the rest of this entry »
Back in the summer of 2001, sex columnist (and my personal hero) Dan Savage held a contest to give a proper name to the act of a woman fucking a man in the ass with a strap-on dildo. After a month of receiving ideas and casting a reader vote, Savage officially welcomed “pegging” into the pervy lexicon. Since then, “pegging” has caught on like wildfire and is now common knowledge for the anally awesome act of strapping-on and going to town on your boy’s bottom.
This week’s Top Five Tuesday is all about asses – well, men’s asses really, as we are featuring pegging aplenty and celebrating all the fabulous things a woman can do with her dude’s dirt star*! Read the rest of this entry »
Happy Friday to all! This week has felt exceptionally long and I know we are all ready for the weekend. One total bright spot during the week was the announcement that hip-hop queens SALT-N-PEPA have joined the Dinah Shore 2010 line-up!! How awesome is that!?!?!
So in honor of how super excited we are to see these spicy ladies of rap, here is a classic throwback that we are crossing our fingers to hear live. I think this gem may have graced the mixtape rewind before, but it’s totally worth a repeat performance.
